Crime #003
Describing your target audience in broad demographic terms such as “women over 40”.
The explanation
“Coaching for women over 40.”
That tells someone whether they fit an age and gender category. It tells them very little about whether your service is relevant to their life.
A 42-year-old starting a business, a 55-year-old returning to work and a 68-year-old adjusting to retirement all qualify. Their reasons for seeking help could be completely different.
The problem is assuming a shared demographic means a shared need. Being over 40 does not tell you what someone is struggling with, what they want to change or what kind of support they are looking for.
Even adding “who want more from life” leaves the important part undefined. More of what? Time? Money? Friendship? A career they enjoy? Those are different reasons to buy different services.
Age and gender can be relevant. Someone may actively want a coach who understands experiences associated with their stage of life. But those details need a connection to the problem your service addresses.
Without that connection, the visitor has to supply it themselves. They might match your description perfectly and still have no idea why they should keep reading.
It can also make your copy feel presumptuous. Not every woman over 40 feels stuck, has lost confidence or wants to reinvent herself. Treating those experiences as universal can alienate the people you hoped to attract.
A useful audience description helps someone recognise their need for your service. “Women over 40” identifies a group, but leaves the reason they might need you unexplained.
How to fix it
Complete this sentence:
For women over 40 who [specific situation] and want to [specific outcome].
For example: “For women over 40 who are returning to work after a career break and want to prepare for management interviews.”
Now the reader has something meaningful to recognise. She knows which situation you help with and what the work is designed to achieve.
Start with the circumstances of your actual customers. What prompted them to seek help? What were they trying to do? What made it difficult? Look for a shared need beyond their age.
Avoid filling the gap with another generalisation. “Who feel stuck” still leaves the problem open to interpretation. “Who want to change careers but cannot afford to start again on an entry-level salary” describes a concrete difficulty.
Then ask whether “over 40” adds useful information. Does your service specifically account for something associated with that life stage? Do customers use age to describe the help they are looking for? If so, keep it and explain its relevance.
If age is incidental, the situation may be enough: “Career coaching for women returning to management after a career break.”
Check your wording with people in the intended situation who do not know your business. Ask what they think you help with and which details make the service feel relevant or irrelevant to them.
You are looking for recognition of a specific need. Matching the age range alone does not tell someone that your service is right for them.
Are you guilty of Crime #003?
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